Sunday, August 4, 2013

Cade is Going to Preschool

This week has been a bit of a roller coaster. We left Hawaii sad to say goodbye to family, vacation, summer in the States, and relaxation. We came home to Korea relieved to find our own beds, our own space, our own home. We trekked to Costco with the help of iPhone maps. We got our necessities at EMart and we even made it home again. We've been coughing so hard we throw up. We've been playing so hard, we can't stop sweating (okay, that's only the kids). All the while, our emotions have been running on high levels. Because tomorrow Cade is going to preschool.

I know. I've been worrying about this for months. I know that nearly every other mom in much of the world has dropped their child off at preschool. I know that there's nothing to worry about. I know that he will love it. But I still worry about dropping my baby off at a school that I know very little about. We had thought that he was starting school on the first. But, when we called the day before, we were informed that they were closed. For summer break. (Seems like information that they would have shared with us before, right?!) So, we've amped up for Cade to start school twice now.

The other day, I was determined to drive there. Learn something. What clothes do I send him in? Does he need supplies? Is there a calendar? (Can you believe I don't even know what days my child does/does not have school?!) Should I send him with food? What if he doesn't like the lunch provided? Are there snacks? I feel so helpless. As of a few days ago, I didn't even know how to get to his school if I had to go pick him up because he was sick. We made it (the drive home was another story). But, they were closed. Just like the woman on the phone said.

The good news is that this is all me. He will be fine. He won't know that I feel like the world's worst mom. Again. He doesn't realize that Kennedy went to a school where I knew everyone--the teachers, the other moms, the pastor. He doesn't know that I feel like he's missing out on something special. All he knows is that he gets to go to preschool. He gets to be the only person in our family to learn Korean. He gets to make new friends and meet new people. And I'm so thankful that he is excited for this adventure, because otherwise I don't think I could do it.

So tomorrow Cade is going to preschool. And I am going to be excited for him. I'm going to wait until he is gone to cry, just like I did with Kennedy. And I am not going to show up at school to check on him. I am going to trust that is the right thing for him. And I am going to pray. All day. Like I've never prayed before!

(Obviously, these pictures in no way relate to Cade's induction into the world of school, but he hasn't been particularly cooperative about first day of school pictures. I took these shots at my dad's house one evening when there was some really great light and a beautiful sunset. I even got into a field for the last one!)

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